THE IMPORTANCE OF LUBRICATING

Our skin is an amazing 5 layered suit of armor; each layer performing a function and having its own personality. It is the largest organ of the body and is a protective line of defense against bacteria, viruses and fungus. Mucous membranes which line body passages (intestine, urethra, vagina) are equally astounding in their function to protect, support, absorb nutrients and secrete important mucus, enzymes and salts.

The epidermis or skin is a tapestry of different thicknesses (.05 -1.1mm) across the body. Thinner areas (eyes, genitalia) are closer to nerve endings so are more receptive to sensual touch, temperature and sensation as well as being more vulnerable to toxins, micro-tears and cuts. Thicker areas are less vulnerable to tearing, dryness and environment and are not as sensitive to touch. Keratin, a waterproofing protein is contained in our outer most skin layer that we can think of as our permanent wetsuit. Get a hole in your wetsuit and in comes the water. Get a tear or cut in your skin and we leave the door open to bad bacteria, virus etc. creeping in.

I am a firm believer in using sex lubrication for two important skin care and Intimate Fitness™ reasons. Certainly lube is great for better sexual sensation but it also helps reduce friction, improves slip and thus helps protect sensitive vulvovaginal and penile skin. Dry sex is uncomfortable, no fun and increases incidence of tearing. It is through micro-tears that HIV and other STIs can be transmitted. Women naturally produce lubrication but it is not always enough, and back door play absolutely requires lube. My favorite for improved sensation and personal protection you know is Uberlube…..… and quite frankly, I WON’T have sex without it!

It is important for us to maintain a strong, intact, inner and outer shell via physical and Intimate Fitness™ as an easy and smart line of defense against infection and disease.

EXPERIENCE APHRODISIACS WITH THE EXPERTS!

Intimate Fitness™ is not simply the caring, maintenance and comfort of your physical body, but also key to it is the stimulation of your sensual mind, curious senses and wondrous spirit. An amazing two part date to get your juices flowing and senses sparkling are the exhibits and OralFix Bar at the Museum of Sex in NYC.

Museum of Sex, is tastefully designed and located on prestigious Fifth Avenue (@ 27th St.) in Manhattan. It is home to permanent and commissioned installations as well as changing exhibits. It is a brilliant mix of pieces that will shock, surprise or excite you, and other pieces of art that will fascinate or challenge you. Have fun being your own non-judgmental self-observer to discover what turns you on, what turns you off and what you would like to know more about. It will surely fuel conversation all night long.

The Museum of Sex store on the ground floor offers a selection of good quality toys, books, novelty etc. Downstairs is the moody, evocative and slightly hedonistic OralFix Bar……..it just makes you want to make out with someone - which is fine with them as long as you are not too edgy. Their specialty is a menu of sensually stimulating libations that are olfactory, visually and orally rousing. Their crafted cocktails, aphrodisiac sodas and jello shots play and tease with the salt, sweet, sour, or slightly savory sensors of your tongue. The magical aphrodisiac ingredients infused into their hand crafted syrups are based on historical research, folklore and scientific evidence.

Try the Jazz Queen cocktail mixed to enhance love, lust and to boost all-important blood flow. The Damask Harem infused with rose petals naturally relaxes the body and stimulates our feel good hormones. You can also request a custom built cocktail selecting exactly those aphrodisiac elements you desire - which is honestly as sexy as having your very own love potion #9!

The clever people at The Museum of Sex are intending to further stimulate you by opening a restaurant called PLAY. It will surely motivate, invigorate and titillate on all levels.

www.museumofsex.com

PRONE TO YEAST INFECTIONS AND DISEASES?

Understanding pH = Potential of Hydrogen and its role in Intimate Fitness™

Some skin care products are touting “pH balanced” in their advertising, but they fail to tell us why pH is critical to our sexual well-being and overall health or what the numbers mean.

Today I am going to give you the skinny on why pH, with a range from 1-14, is so important and focus on why vaginal pH is key to a happy, healthy and sexy you!

Our bodies are in a constant flux to maintain an optimal balance between acidity and alkalinity to provide the best environment in which our cells can thrive. We can help or hinder this balancing act with our diet, medication, environment, stress levels etc. Pure water has pH of 7 or neutral, a pH less than 7 is acidic and greater than 7 is basic or alkaline. Normal blood pH is in the low 7s, good urine pH is about 6-6.5, and healthy saliva is between 6 -7.4.

When our pH goes awry anywhere in the body, we can become susceptible to disease and infection. A healthy vagina is acidic and has a pH of about 4.5 and the vulva is around 5. Post menopause it is more alkaline, in the 6-7 range. A normal healthy vulvovaginal environment is a delicate balance of good and bad bacteria with a beautiful natural defense mechanism in the form of good microorganisms called Lactobacilli. The lactobacilli flourish in an acidic space which it self-maintains through lactic acid production that protects us against infection.

It is when our pH is thrown off and becomes more alkaline that yeast or candida can proliferate, or bad microorganisms can take over resulting in infection and a very irritated and unhappy woman. There are numerous culprits that cause vaginal pH to go awry resulting in dreaded itching, irritation and infection. Most off the shelf soap is a pH 9-10 or is anti-bacterial and strips the vulva of all bacteria to leave us vulnerable. Sex friction and semen (pH of 7-8) negatively impact our environment and having new or multiple lovers often results in irritation and imbalance too. Keep sugar and glycerin away from the area as it can quickly result in pH change. Our menstrual flow is like a stream that takes flora and fauna along for the ride thus removing our good and bad bacteria as it exits the body. Stress or super tight clothing can also result in upsetting the pH apple cart. Antibiotics also typically promote yeast infections in some women.

I know this is a long list with lots of pitfalls, but there are Intimate Fitness™ steps we can take to keep the vagina healthy and harmful microorganisms at bay. Happily we can take smart proactive and avoidant measures to assist in the maintenance of our delicately balanced environment.

I want to properly cover vaginal Intimate Fitness™ and not skim over it, so will leave it for the following entry. In the meantime, remember that your vagina is miraculously self-cleansing and doesn’t require you to aggressively clean or dress it up. A healthy vagina is neutral smelling and has a rhythm you should become familiar with, so you can identify when/if you are imbalanced or potentially vulnerable.

LOW LIBIDO IN MEN

I realize that I said I would be covering exciting libido boosting tips this week, but I thought it first important to cover the topic of male low libido. Knowing that men experience it and why may help to ease some anxiety, balance the scales and normalize this situation a bit for everyone.

Many of the reasons covered in last week’s installment apply to men. Psychological factors such as depression, anxiety or poor body image and personal habits like lack of sleep or life stress can contribute to diminished sex drive. Too high or too low body weight can cause male hormone fluctuations. And yes, as with women, medication side effects and diet can curb our hunger for hot, sensual sex too.

Men’s endocrine imbalance is called hypogonadism or Low T, the T for testosterone. Low T can occur due to 1.signaling problems that may exist between the brain and testes which causes a reduction in testosterone production, 2. testes are unable to produce enough testosterone due to a defect, 3. the brain decides that testosterone levels are too high and decides to cut production.

Indicative symptoms of Low T are low to no sex drive, mood swings and reduced energy levels. If you suspect it in yourself or partner, get it checked out soon. The wonderful news is TRT or testosterone replacement therapy can help improve these symptoms and hormone levels to restore drive and virility. Consult with a trusted physician on treatment options as there are several.

A psychological and communication issue that can also take the sexy juju right out of men and women is performance anxiety. Men with ED (erectile dysfunction) or who lack of erotic esteem may be self-conscious and avoid sex. Women wish to be great lovers but “good girls” aren’t supposed to be good at it, and no one has taught us how after all. The truth be told, getting to and maintaining great, sensual, mind blowing, take you to another stratosphere sex is learned and oh yes, practiced, practiced, practiced. I urge compassion, experimentation, exploration, education, communication, shedding false constraints……….and of course Uberlube.

Next week I promise we will explore libido enhancing activities and ideas. Have a super sexy, intimately fit week!

LOW LIBIDO

By Nina Helms

This is a big topic, so let’s start with an official definition of libido: 1. Sexual desire. 2. The energy of the sexual drive as a component of the life instinct.

Low libido extinguishes our hunger for sex, diminishes our allure and sexual charisma and can result in our sex lives taking a back seat to the business and stresses of daily life. Low libido takes a toll on intimate relationships, sexual organs can atrophy - yes, if you don’t use it you lose it - and the many benefits of sex are missed out upon. This is not a good thing, but fear not, there are solutions. Sexual satisfaction and a happy healthy sex life can and even should, in my book, be a priority. And the good news is that later in life, when low libido tends to happen, is actually when sex can be at its absolute best!

There are three big physical life events for women when libido takes a hit. These are perimenopause, postpartum phases, and menopause. Reproductive hormones fluctuate, causing symptoms like weight gain, mood swings, insomnia, vaginal dryness and an overall feeling of being off. It is these disruptive and unwelcome symptoms caused by endocrine roller coaster rides that can strip us of our sexy.

Our erotic energy is also strongly tied to our heads, hearts and self- image.
Let’s keep in mind that the brain is the largest sex organ of the body.

Our attitudes about sex play a great role in our sexual desire. What sensual and sexual permission do we give ourselves? Do you explore, experiment and ask for what you want?

How much we self-love absolutely impacts the quality of sexual satisfaction. Do you like your body and think you are sexy and desirable or do you engage in self-deprecation?

Alcohol, tobacco, anti-depressants and other meds can also take a toll. So are you medicating?

Caring for children or aging parents, financial difficulties or relationship issues can weigh heavily on sexual vivacity. Is your life running rough shod over you sapping you of any time or energy to engage in sensual play?

An interdependent blend of the physical, the emotional, the environment and mind set coalesce to generate our sex drive and how we show up as our erotic selves. We are highly sexual creatures, engineered to attract, desire, give and receive pleasure. You have the power to make it bloom or push it off the radar.

Managing low libido is something to be done with medical professionals, through open communication with your lover, and by making your sexuality a personal priority. Next week I will make some sensual suggestions to help stimulate sex drive and recapture aspects of Intimate Fitness™ that physicians or analysts may not have in their bailiwick.

VAGINAL DRYNESS: SELF-LUBE

My team of sexual health enthusiasts and I have been asked to cover the subject of vaginal dryness especially in menopausal women, but first we thought it would be fun to dive into the flip side - wetness. I can’t wait to tell you why foreplay is so very important.

If you read my piece on douching, you are already familiar with how miraculous the female sexual body is. In addition to self-cleansing, we are wonderfully self-protecting and our own ability to naturally lubricate is one of those forms of protection. We normally have a thin layer of clear fluid on the walls of the vagina maintained by Estrogen. Estrogen helps sustain a healthy vaginal lining by keeping it constantly moisturized, thick and elastic. The other form of self-lubrication we experience is when we are turned on and aroused - vaginal transudation. You know……..that wonderful stirring and delicious ache below your belly button when something or someone makes you crave sex. If you pay close attention, you can feel it happening. Vaginal lubrication in preparation for sex is our natural way to prepare and facilitate great feeling intercourse. Sexual activity when dry can be painful for both men and women.

Now here is why foreplay is so important for you physically in addition to stimulating your mind and imagination. A woman’s body takes about 10-15 minutes to fully “respond” and be ready for intercourse. We need time for our tissues to engorge with blood and for the lubrication to build for fabulous, slick sex. Amazingly, our cervix and uterus tilt to accommodate penetration and the back of the vagina expands. This “ballooning” explains our desire to be filled. So tell your partner that if he or she plays with you for a while, and takes the time to really arouse you the sex will be even better!

I highly recommend you always keep personal/sex lubrication at hand in case you are having a marathon session or if you just want extra slip to enhance sexual pleasure. Wetter is just better! If you are pre-menopausal and healthy, your degree of self-lubrication doesn’t mean anything, so don’t judge or be judged by it.

My favorite brand of premium lube is silicone based Uberlube. It is long-lasting, body and condom friendly and has a sleek no spill design. I also love Uberlube because it is tasteless and great for oral sex as well. Sliquid’s H2O would be my water-based lube choice, but keep in mind water-based doesn’t stay slippery as long and can become tacky pretty quickly. If you have any STD’s keep away from the lubes with heating or cooling features, they can trigger an episode or cause inflammation.

Wishing all of you happy, healthy and sensationally slippery sex!